this blog is Moving

TheMakeupSquid has moved to a new Home, if you enjoyed your visits here please click on the banner and follow my new home, I always follow back :)
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Moving my blog!!

I have decided to move my blog to a new blog. ThatLaurieGirl
first off I want to explain why I changed my blog.
First of all, I didn't want to be just TheMakeupSquid. I know it was unique and all, but I really felt cornered and nobody puts baby in a corner. Right? (dirty dancing reference for all you youngins)
Truth is, I want to blog about other things than just makeup and beauty. I found myself overwhelmed with doing a beauty, techy type and relationship blog. I had three blogs going!  I was going nuts, so I decided to combine all three.
This time I am using my real name in the title, even though I will always be Squiddy to some :)
My goal for this blog is to be about a lil of everything, I mean I am not just a makeup junkie.
I'm a mom, wife, woman, and all those other things, so I will blog about, what I want to blog about, when I want to blog about it. No matter what it's about it will fit in ThatLaurieGirl  Because I am not just about one thing, I am about a lot of things :) 
Whew! That felt great! I hope you stick around as I will be posting all kinds of stuff there and importing a lot of posts from my other blogs.  This message will be posted on all my other blogs, so please give a follow and help me spread the word, I will keep the blog up during the migration all links will be removed, but replaced on the new blog. Please help me out during this transition it means a lot to me that I have your support!!
Thanks in advance!   Follow TheLaurieGirl on Bloglovin'


Falling in love for the first time again.

I met my husband online, but we knew the same people even though we have officially never met. We talked for days, exchanged photos, met and fell in love. It was instant and perfect. 
I always said 
"If someone loves you, they have to love you when you're a loser, not when everything it perfect."

When someone is in their loser stage in life they are at their worst. This is when you can see what they are truly like in times of stress or any type of turmoil. I met my husband during this time in my life. I was trying to find myself and who I was at 34. I was wild and free, but I knew something or someone was missing. 
I needed a partner a lover and a friend. But that was no where to be found. Sure I dated, but nothing ever clicked. Until That day. It was a normal day. I  woke, showered with coffee in hand I went through my email and found some pics he sent me earlier as there was a three hour difference between us.
He always sent me good morning emails, quotes and such. But today it was photos.
I swear I will never forget the feeling that came over me when I saw that picture and I would give anything to have it back. This pc I had at the time crashed and everything was lost.
He was facing his laptop while lying on his side wearing a baby pink polo oxford. Now I don't know if it was the lighting, the pose his messy hair or what, but staring at that photo I knew I would marry this man.
I loved that photo so much that when he came to visit I told him to bring the shirt with him.
Yes we eloped during that visit, I got pregnant a month later and 4 years later we are still here.
Yes we fight or mostly I yell I should say. We do have our moments where we say were are done, but after the frustration and anger is gone, we still look for each other.
There are times when I feel I rushed into this and should have waited because there are things he does that completely irritate my soul, but at the end of the day I know he is the best guy. No one will put up with my BS haha! We did have where I felt I didn't love him anymore and was ready to let go. But life and responsibilities kept me from walking away, so I stayed. Yes we did not sleep in the same bed, yes we didn't talk for days, but we got through it.

The other day I was going through my closet and found the pink polo oxford, I took it from him and been sleeping in it for four years. I looked at it and I remembered why I fell in love with him, yes he doesn't look the same, yes he doesn't act the same, but I know the guy in the pink shirt is there inside and every once in a while I get to spend time with him. I am glad I fell in love with my husband for the first time again.
Our life wont be perfect because life isnt perfect, but as long as we have that pink shirt we will be fine.
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When it's over, it's time to start over.

Today I am going to give the floor to a friend and fellow blogger Ashley Maria who blogs over at http://ashleymariablogs.blogspot.com/. She is smart and ahead of her time. If you want to learn a thing or two about life, love and being a beautiful woman inside and out then Ashley is your girl. I want to thank Ashley for this lovely and inspiring post. So Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you Ashley Maria.

When it's over, it's time to start over.

So, ladies... it's over.

You've cried all of your tears. Spent most of the days and nights thinking it all over and over and over again. You're done calling, texting, and social media stalking your ex. You've finally accepted it.

So... Now what?

Since the end of my relationship, I've asked myself the same question everyday. I think about what to do next. Being in a relationship calls for spending a lot of time with the other person and eventually planning a future with them. In the midst of all of this, you may forget what it's like to be yourself as an individual. I becomes Us and You becomes We. This isn't necessarily a bad thing, but after being in a serious relationship for a while, you may forget how to distinguish between the two.

So if and when the relationship ends, you may have the same conversation that I have with myself everyday. What the heck am I gonna do now?

If that's the case, I have a few tips on what some of those things may be...

1. Get fit!
Join a gym! Get back to the gym! Start getting active!
What's a better way to get your life back on track then taking control of your health?
Plus, it wouldn't hurt getting back in those old jeans! ;)

2. Rediscover Your Friends and Family
Surround yourself with people that love, support, and care about you.
Head out with your girlfriends for a ladies night!
Call up the ladies in your family for a mani/pedi day or movie night!
In the moments when the pain of a relationship hits, being around them will make all the difference.

3. Have Quiet Time
When ever I'm feeling overwhelmed with phone calls, texts, emails, social media,
I shut my phone off (or put it on silent), close my laptop, turn the television off and just lay back.
You'd be surprised what this can do.
Meditate, do yoga, listen to soft music, write down your thoughts, or just sit in silence and clear your mind.

4. Redefine Your Goals and Meet Them!
This is something I do every single day. I take my notebook and start thinking of things that I want to accomplish. I start out with my short term goals and begin to think about the long term.
This year, I want to finish a certain amount of classes, lose weight, move out, and possibly start a new job.
What are yours?

5. Get Dolled Up!
Girl, go get your hair did!
Get yo nails did!
Get yo makeup did!
Get a new outfit!
Go look and feel beautiful for you, girl!

6. Know Your Worth
Never, ever forget your worth.
Even though the relationship is over, that does not mean that you are a failure...period!
Things happen for a reason, we all make mistakes but this does not mean that we are failures.
We live and we learn.
WE define our worth. No one else.
Plain and simple.

7. Find a Hobby
For me, it's makeup.
When ever I get the chance, I sit myself in front of my makeup and go to town.
And now, I'm slowly turning back to music and writing again.
What's something that you're interested in but never tried?

8. Understand That It's Okay to Be Alone
Everyone needs someone, it's true. We'll all find that special someone one day.
In the meantime, it's okay to be alone. In fact, it's a good thing.
Rediscover you. Find out who YOU are as yourself.

9. Remain Positive
Having a positive attitude on things makes all the difference.

10. Live
Keep going, girlfriend.
Things only get better from here.
...but only if you want them to.

Talk to you soon ladies...

If there is a relationship based post you would like to share on the relationship daily, whether it be advice, support, inspiration of any kind, please feel free to send a E-mail.

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Women aren't born a bitches, they become bitches

Bitch, Is a word used to describe a female dog or a word used to describe a non conforming human female.
I personally only use the word when I see anyone male or female being hateful and spiteful for no good reason. But as I have grown, I have learned a lot about why men say or use the word Bitch.

To me a Bitch is a woman who will not except anything  that she feels she doesn't deserve under any circumstances.

Women aren't born a bitches, they become bitches.

When a Person is pushed into a corner and they feel their happiness and overall well being is being threatened, they become defensive and go into oh, no you didn't mode. Relationship after relationship, the woman at some point grows a brain and stands up and states Enough is Enough! I will not be made a doormat for you!. I will not stand by and watch you waste not only your life by mine as well! I will not accept any BS from anyone at any time in my short life. The only men on this earth that are allowed to receive unconditional love from me are my sons period.

I am not your mother, I am not your sister. You will be expected to play your part, you will be expected to be the man you play yourself off to be, If I see this is just a front, believe me, I will let you know. Loudly and clearly. If you don't like it remember, I survived without you before and I will survive again!

Yes I am a bitch, but you know what your BS made this bitch.

So next time you ask why your lady is being a bitch, instead ask what you did to make her a bitch.

This is not a personal post, just something I was thinking. What do you think?

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Always the last to know

The wife or husband is always the last to know, when it comes to cheating or affairs.

Is this because we are so wrapped up in the situation we can't see it? Or are we too busy thinking about ourselves that we can't feel the distance that has come into the relationship?

I have been through something like this many years ago and many people who knew about the affair tried to warm me and tell me, without actually saying "Hey! your husband is sleeping with someone else."
I was so wrapped up in the kids and the house I obviously wasn't paying attention. I was so naive that I couldn't see or hear the warning signs.

I know that 10 years later this my ex regrets the choice he made, because I left the relationship. Not on account of the cheating, I didn't find out until weeks later after the separation that there was someone else.
He ended up marrying her and having 4 children.

I left for not having a partner, for feeling alone in a relationship with two kids. I have grown a lot since that relationship and I have learned a lot. I was immature, I didn't know much and my ex didn't want to give me the chance to grow into a person.

He still cheats on her he admitted to me years later, he is just that guy. I don't know that what they say about once a cheater always a cheater is true or not, but he makes it seem true. I don't know if she knows or not or is lying in the bed she made for herself, but they seem okay with each other.

I still ask myself from time to time, looking back and asking myself why couldn't I see it? The only thing I can come up with is that I was on a different path. I was more interested in my kids and my home. Different priorities I guess.

Is it because I wouldn't think about doing it, that I automatically think anyone else would?
Why do you think the the spouse or partner is always the last to know?

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The truth is nothing will change

When you are allowing them back for another try, there is a fear that sets in. A fear of not knowing how it will go. Will things change? Will they be the same?

The truth is nothing will change.

I will just become more lenient and over look a lot. To be honest, in my experience with relationships I have learned one thing people don't change. My sister often tells me, that I have this knack for being with people I feel I can help or change their world for them.

Every guy I have been with has had family issues.
They have all been the black sheep of them family.
They have all been through a horrible past relationship.

I don't know what draws me to these people, but this is where I find myself.

I am a fixer, a make it all better type of person and I take this upon myself many times, feeling I need to make it better or I know how to fix this.

People don't change, I change.

If you are trying to fix a plumbing problem yourself and nothing you try is working, what's the next step?
Call a plumber? Right?

I mean I try to make things right and make things all better, but sometimes people can't be fixed, they just come as they are. This is either accepted or not.

Maybe, my problem is trying to fix someone, maybe my trying to fix someone needs to be fixed.

I should stop doing this, I should not want to fix anyone.
But when you see someone who is lost aren't you going to offer directions?
Do I help or just let it go?

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